L to the L to the B

It's not a couplet, but it's close. The last sentence I wrote on my Admin final, my last final, summing up a question where I was asked to offer advice on the likelihood of a successful immigration appeal for a Mr. and Mrs. Singh, was not without its own internal rhyme:

"Things aren't looking great for the Singhs."

I'm pretty happy with the 21 pages of answers I wrote before that (yes, the longest exam I've ever written) but I especially like that last line. The cheekiness wasn't intentional, but I think it nicely represents my attitude towards law school: there's a lot of stuff to learn, but there's always room for a sense of humour.

Alright, maybe you wouldn't deliver a client bad news this way, but if writing three years worth of posts on this site has taught me anything, law school has some pretty funny moments.

Anyway, I'm officially done. Now all that's left is to recoup this staggering, staggering debt.

A Few Good Exams

Three exams done, one to go. I know what you're wondering: if my courses were a movie (specifically, the best lawyer movie of all time) then how would my experiences with each final exam correspond to scenes from said movie? I'll tell you.

Entertainment Law:



This one's tough to gauge. It's a paper course, and I've handed in my essay, which I feel strongly about - but there's no real advance measure of how well I've done. So a scene about driving through Guantanamo Bay as the particular focus of trained enemy snipers seemed appropriately descriptive.

Civil Procedure:



In a word, confidence. If you recall, in this scene, Cruise bluffs his opposing counsel into submission by boasting an extensive knowledge of pre-trial procedures and evidentiary motions that can delay a trial seemingly indefinitely: damn if that isn't exactly what I did on this test.

International Trade Law:



I want the truth, if the truth is an A on an exam I'm pretty sure I killed. Self-assuredness is no guarantee, however. Being wrong for Tom Cruise meant treason and death - for law students, being wrong has no effect on the credits you earn. Literally, you cannot flunk out of law school. Seriously.

Administrative Law:



Since I haven't written this one yet, and it scares the hell out of me, this is my best guess.

Fraidy Cat

What's this? Admin ends early? Normally this class rushes headlong to 9pm like some Law & Order episode bound for continuation, but somehow tonight I find with more time to prepare for Lost at 10.

Today's class was all about one case, Pushpanathan v. Canada (Minister of Citizenship and Immigration). Because the case is the Rosetta Stone of judicial review in administrative law, the word Pushpanathan was mentioned a lot. Of course, every time I heard it, it just sounded like two words pushed together, Panther Anathema.

I mention this because I keep a mental list of cool band names I'd use were I ever in one. Therefore, I'll be adding Panther Anathema to: Conquistador, The Murders in the Rue Morgue (or simply "The Murders" to die-hard fans), and Jean Valjean to name a few. (I'm sure friend and reader W will remind me of more I've mentioned in the past.) And hey, let's add Rosetta Stone to the list too.

Pow! Krak! Thud! Appeal Denied!

I've had a resurgence of nostalgia for my England days as of late. Four years ago, I was living at Herstmonceux Castle in East Sussex, living a rather carefree existence with a minimum of classes a week. Sort of like last semester of third year law.

That's why I found it such a strange and cool coincidence when I saw the following panel in a Hellboy comic:



This made me that much more a fan of Mike Mignola's woodcut-styled story. Part of the fun of Herstmonceux was walking about the grounds at night looking for evidence of these ghosts. Now while the ghost that HB describes is indeed one of the legends, people I went to the castle with would likely agree that the 9-foot tall headless drummer is the best ghost of all, specifically because he was the only one to leave a legacy of a pub named in his honour.

I almost never read comics unless it's an Alan Moore work or somehow related to one of the best books ever. But I've often thought that some case law might have been better represented in comic form. Certainly some of this snooze-inducing Admin Law could stand to use some action shots.

Night of the Living Admin

This is the first semester in 7 years of university that I've had a night class. I wasn't looking forward to it because, first of all, it's Administrative Law, not renowned for keeping one awake, and the class is on Wednesdays, dangerously close to interrupting Lost.

But now, I sort of like it. This last Wednesday I had the time to take a walk down to Kits beach. Of course, I suppose part of the reason I never took a night class in Kingston is that there were no nice beaches to go to during the day, only the shores of a sludge-ridden "great" lake.


Somehow, the director of Rumble in the Bronx had no issues shooting here.

Lawyers will be zombie stand-ins

We are off to the races in the final term. And like each new term, there are some surprises, although I guess I didn't expect them to come from Admin Law. Maybe it's early in the course, but I like what I hear, the profs seem easy-going, and best of all - the reading material is free. This is a benefit understated until I tell you I have to pay $92 for 153 pages in International Trade Law.

I can't speak about the Trade Law class itself because the professor was missing for the inaugural lecture. Say what you will about the generosity of lawyers, we extended the famous 5-minute rule a whole extra half-hour before we left. Or maybe this just speaks to the tenacity of lawyers and their inclination to extend measurements of time...

Thankfully, Entertainment Law is shaping up to be as great as I'd hoped it would be. Speaking of entertainment, there was a large crowd of guests at the school the other day, and word on the street is that they were a film crew scouting locations around the building. Now I'm confused, because the only movie I can picture being filmed at the law building is the British film 28 Weeks Later, the sequel to my favorite movie of 2003, 28 Days Later - but I guess if a plot calls for a dank, impenetrable refuge where people can hide from zombies and possibly a nuclear attack to wipe those zombies out, then, sure, the Curtis Building is the natural choice.

The final five

It's a good time of year to appraise the classes for the upcoming and - say it with me - final term of law school. I've got five classes and four written exams, which, after the relative breeze that two written finals was this last month - might come back to haunt me. (As the Bogeylawyer, maybe?)

Here's the list:

Real Estate Transactions: this is a course I wouldn't lose sleep over not taking, (there's plenty of sleep to lose in law school anyhow). But, I enjoyed Land Use Planning immensely, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy a lot of the byzantine mess that is Property Law. Also, I now live in Vancouver: I've come to learn that I will likely be engaged in no less than a dozen condo transactions and hoard apartment units as if they were rare Hot Chip b-sides. Knowing a bit of the fine print on all those lease agreements might not be a bad idea.

Civil Procedure: I've had mixed results with "Procedure" courses in the past. Advanced Criminal Procedure is, without a doubt, the easiest course you can take in law school, and yet it's probably going to go down as the worst exam I wrote in the three years. I even had a professor that faintly resembled - in looks only - Arrested Development's Barry Zuckerkorn, which makes my poor performance even that more annoying. Here's hoping Civil Procedure will be a bit more civil friendly.

Administrative Law: without a doubt, this class gets the worst buzz amongst students at law school. The reviews range from boring, demanding, difficult to study for and the best reason to become a doctor. However, most will admit that the course is sorta necessary. Court cases often begin in the less glitzy realm of tribunals, after all. I'm not holding my breath for any magic to happen, but since I'm intent on getting a comprehensive legal education, I'm willing to bite the bullet. And they say lawyers will weasel out of any unpleasant situation.

Entertainment Law: devotees of this site may recall that I possess various screenplays and teleplays in various stages of completion. I haven't written about them on this site for a long time, because a) it was probably foolish to expect I could accomplish so much writing when there is so much reading to be done in law school and b) I think any scripts about the "legal experience" might benefit from actual experience. (That's just a hunch). If nothing else, I look forward to this class for any help with how to land a script deal.

Trusts: I can stand being angered by Admin law, but this class runs a high risk of just plain boring me. When people ask what classes I'm taking this term, this is the class I can never remember. In fact, when I mention it, first they are appalled I'd take over four classes in the final term and second, it provokes zero response. As far as I know, trusts are responsible for creating trust-fund babies, a notoriously unpleasant strata of society. But, like any jury, I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt and pronounce it my Wild Card Class. I've been pleasantly surprised with courses like Secured Transactions in the past, so it's all I can hope for. Then again, it's the only class I have on a Friday morning - never a good sign for longevity.

Present perfect subjunctive? Check

With only a few weeks until course registration, I'm trying to create a shortlist of classes for my final year. The schedule will ultimately depend on class times and exam conflicts, but in the meantime I'd appreciate any recommendations from fellow law types, and a heads up if you've chosen the same one. Without further ado:

European Union Law
When I studied Literature in undergrad, European lit was always my favorite. Let's hope European jurists have a similar knack for producing classics. (Fun fact: before the accession of 13 more member states to the EU in 2005, the list of member countries could be remembered by the acronym "Baffling Pigs." I learned that on an educational field trip to the Bank of London a few years ago, my singular memory of the event.)

Securities Regulation
This is another class I'm really excited about, as it seems to be replacing IP as the "hip" legal area. (Mildly amusing fact: the Sarbanes-Oxley Act, aimed at responsible accounting, is often referred to by the acronym SOX, which isn't terribly interesting until I tell you that I once worked at a company that gave socks as a thank-you to the team who successfully implemented SOX regulations.)

International Business Transactions
I like the sound of this one, because it combines three independently interesting legal words and makes an even better phrase. Sort of like Caramel Light Frappucino.

Administrative Law & Municipal Law
These two I'm deciding between. I've been told by some that Admin law is boring, painful, but ultimately useful, while others say Municipal is the way to go. After two years of law school, four years of undergrad and one ill-fated year of tennis lessons, I've learned that you won't like every class you take. Need some input here, folks.

Professional Responsibility
Lawyer-client relations can hide be a veritable minefield of unethical and improper situations, making this course a veritable mine detector. (Useless fact: if you ever played any of the Metal Gear Solid iterations on the Playstation, you of course know that mines are easily traversed by simply crawling over them.)


Advanced Legal Research
I'm a fan of hands-on research and actually opening up the tattered court reports from days of yore. In some museums, you'd pay a decent sum to see such books behind glass. Incidentally, I've just learned that the Vancouver Art Gallery is by-donation on Tuesday nights. Anyone feel like being a culture vulture?

Conflict of Laws
Another course I've heard great things about. If you've ever wondered why your deluxe two-disc Shaun of the Dead Region 2 DVD doesn't work on your player in North America, then you have the same sort of questions that will be answered in this class, which looks at laws across jurisdictions. Whether or not there is a black-market mechanism that can adjudicate both Civil and Common law systems simultaneously, remains to be seen.

Advanced Spanish II
While this class choice may seem a bit out of izquierdo field, I assure you it's been a long time coming. I left my undergraduate university one Spanish course short of a bonus certificate that qualifies me to work anywhere in the world. Having maxed out on law credits during my first two years, I have room to spare in the third. So, once I finally master the pluperfect subjunctive tense, baffled pigs everywhere had better look out.