Thursday, March 30, 2006

'Twas beauty that called the clean-up crew

It's almost April and the countdown to my three exams (Federalism, Evidence and IP), which would explain the prevalence of these short, McSweeney's-esque lists in recent blog posts. I promise I'll write something more substantive, or at least more law-related, soon. Until then:

Things overheard during a viewing of King Kong on DVD made by a certain someone:

  • I guess he's pretty big.
  • Hmm, that's going to be pretty messy.
Updated: to include another messy scene.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Shift + F7 Dammit!

Here's a short list of some of the words that came to mind while watching last night's episode of 24, certainly the most expensive episode yet, and involving Jack torturing not one but two people (including his girlfriend) and outrunning a series of fiery explosions at a natural gas plant:

  • magnanimous
  • impugned
  • Hobbes-ian
  • feudalistic
  • constitutionality
  • fireball

Back to this essay.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Shift + F7

Essay break.

Here is a short list of some of the five-dollar words employed in my essay on the undue jurisprudential contextualization of a reasonable expectation of privacy (my Charter paper):

  • magnanimous
  • impugned
  • Hobbes-ian
  • antiquated
  • feudalistic
  • constitutionality
  • law
Alright, back to work.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

His synecdoche jokes kill

A while back I compiled a short list of three awesome things I heard on TV. I haven't had much time to watch the ol' telly lately, what with studying the law and all - but I did manage to catch one recent gem.

Anyone who's ever seen Squire Barnes on Canadian news channels knows the guy is hilarious. But speaking on B.C.'s minor hockey rivalry, he revealed how he's also a poetic master of the simile: "Like a 21 year-old single male sitting alone at a bar, the Vancouver Giants have been subject to Cougar attacks all season long."

A quick update on the law front: I'm now done with Ethics (not in general, that doesn't happen till after third year - zing!) after finishing my paper and the classes. While I'd normally be happy that I have three more free hours during the week, I know they'll have to be spent working on the other subjects. Except when I watch King Kong next week. Or Apprentice, OC, and Grey's Anatomy. Or Conviction, Survivor and Amazing Race...

Man I need more time.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Y am whatte Y am

Simply awesome*: put this up there with the online Pepys Diary, turns out there is a blog maintained by Geoffrey Chaucer. He takes questions and doesn't shy from discussing modern stuff, like the latest gaming console, "thatte XBOX CCCLX". [Via folks at BoingBoing].

*Readers will note that I was previously an English Lit major and awesome is a relative term.

2 minutes for abuse of pastry

Three positives from being at last night's hockey game, where Vancouver got horsewhipped by Detroit 7 to 3 (This is what happens when you are not the Calgary Flames):

1. Not having been to a game in years, I continued my boyhood tradition of buying a puck after the game. I was also not dismayed like the last instance of this tradition, where the saleswoman absolutely refused to sell me a visiting San Jose puck because they won that night, leaving me with duplicate Flames pucks.

2. The crowd was treated to a new penalty. After Vancouver went to the box about 10 times in the first period with no Detroit calls, Matt Cooke got called in the third period for "abuse of the official" - and he got an uproarious standing ovation.

3. I ran into the Pillsbuy Dough Boy mascot. I poked him in the stomach. One of us giggled.

Here is a picture from the practice which was obviously pointless.

Saturday, March 18, 2006


Public intoxication, reckless endangerment and battery are but a few of the crimes you study at law school. But for one afternoon every year, they make for a hell of a good time. The annual law school trike race happened yesterday and went off in fine form. By fine, I mean people got soaked really, really bad.

I didn't compete like last year, but that's not to say I was safe from the hefty doses of splashback you get from standing on the sidelines.

My favorite part of all of it is the inevitability of the massive waterfight. When you have that many water balloons, and not enough time to evenly dispense with them, it's only a matter of time before the rationing stops and the irrationality begins.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Conclusion of the nonology

An attempt to catch a free screening of V for Vendetta was quashed earlier this week as I found myself at the end of a lineup that circled itself more times than the logic in the Matrix sequels. I'm not sure what organizers thought would happen with a 300-seat capacity theatre and a campus of 30,000 students, about half of whom probably have a greater-than-normal fascination with Natalie Portman.

Anyway, it made me want to see the movie more, and got me primed for another summer season of movies. Then I saw the trailer for this, Drawing Restraint 9, which sort of shook my faith in the whole notion of "movies as entertainment." Surely this must be the artsiest/bizarre film ever made. And I've seen Return to Oz.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

The portentous posterior

Hop, skip and hyperlink over to the Tyee where you can read my latest article on the sex-ification of crime dramas and divining wisdom from Dennis Franz's NYPD butt.

But don't let that mental image stop you - though it almost did me. Trying to do research on when that particular episode aired was tough enough. Googling "Dennis Franz nude" is like entering a mine field. Tread lightly my dear readers.

Monday, March 13, 2006

No cool way to play that instrument

If the names Meredith, George, Burke and Yang mean anything to you, then you'll know why this is so funny.

This show has long since stolen the crown from The O.C. for being the best source of witty cynicism, but somehow this moment from last night's episode was just pure hilarity.

Anyway, since that was random, here's something else. Watch this video of Sims creator Will Wright play God with his new game, Spore. Sure, it's a half an hour long, but that's really just a fraction of the time you'll spend playing this game in the long run.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Law blog goes star rag

Every Friday, Entertainment Weekly publishes their "Must List," 10 things that everyone should do to brush-up on pop culture and thus become a functional member of society. (I shouldn't sound so cynical, I like EW - with so many magazines discussing such matters, they take it the least seriously.)

So in that vein, here is my weekend-edition "Must List," written in hopefully that same irreverant, sly way:

  • Ethics: this essay is just begging to be written, a 30-page page-turner on torture that has us screaming for more.
  • Charter: now that the outline's done, the fun is just beginning with a quick glance at over 25 years worth of jurisprudence on the reasonable expectation to privacy. Peek-a-boo!
  • Intellectual Property: it's no trade secret that there's a lot of reading for the trademarks section. With copyrights you can do no copywrong.
  • Federalism: write the essay or write the test? How will the dilemma get resolved before the season finale? We can't wait to find out. Really, we can't.

  • Evidence: Exhibit A: reading! When we say there's a lot, that ain't no hearsay. Don't object, you'll be pleasantly overruled.

(Yes, the pictures of celebrities are entirely superfluous. But doesn't it feel like you're reading a magazine?)

Monday, March 06, 2006

Countdown to Donald Trump facts...

Just the thing to get you warmed up for a two hour special of 24 tonight. A ripoff sure, yet perhaps more timely than the original Chuck Norris facts:

Jack Bauer facts.

Yet still snubbed by Oscar

Big day for Law Revue: the February show got a big write-up in this month's Legal Eye. Amongst the accolades: "This year’s Law Revue was a huge success and no article or photo will do it any justice. It truly was a night of hilarity..."

If you want to read the whole issue, a PDF for March is available here. In lieu of that, here is an article/photo which won't do it any justice.

As well, our DVD's came back from the copier and are now ready for pickup. This project was definitely a labour of love - and also blood, sweat, tears, raised voices, frozen computers, etc.

For any who still wish to buy one, email ubclawrevue at gmail dot com. I'm personally pleased that I got to record a director's commentary, one I'm sure is a good future contender the Onion's "Commentary Tracks of the Damned" column.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

I like saying Philip Seymour Hoffman

Some quick Oscar thoughts apres show:

Ang Lee is the new James Cameron.

Philip Seymour Hoffman deserved it because he always plays the most fascinating characters and makes them even greater. Philip Seymour Hoffman did not deserve it for his enthralling speech-writing abilities.

Introducing Jake Gyllenhaal as a supporting actor nominee after he already lost is more cruel than Heath Ledger's treatment of him in that film. What's that line again, Ang?

George Clooney is the new Jack Nicholson.

I didn't want Crash to win best picture because I fear the inevitable onslaught of "'Crash' crashes Oscars" headlines.

Ben Stiller should host into perpetuity.

Ang Lee was awful.